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  • Writer's pictureConstance Nash

Unlocking the Ability to Love Yourself



The idea of loving yourself is easy to grasp, but it can be harder to figure out what self-love actually looks like for you.


It may require a hard conversation with yourself about what is helping you and what isn’t.


Most people find that introspection intimidating, but it is an essential step in the process.


Overall, self-love consists of multiple components: self-awareness, self-worth, self-esteem, and self-care.


Self-awareness

This concept involves knowing yourself, what thoughts you have, what triggers you to have pleasant and unpleasant emotions, and why you act in the manner that you do.


It increases our emotional intelligence to have some sit down time where we can do some self-reflection about this.


It may help to step outside yourself and pretend that you are an observer of your own experience. Take some notes down, as if you were studying a science specimen.


Additionally, meditation and Journaling are excellent ways to increase self-awareness.



Self-worth

This is a difficult concept to grasp because, for the most part, we judge our worth based on how we were valued in childhood.


That, and with what society identifies as worthy. Self-worth is the collection of beliefs that we have about ourselves.


Positive self-worth is when we’re at a place of acknowledging that we are valuable no matter what we have done or not done.


Truly believing that you are inherently worthy can be hard, but it may help to sit down and do some reflection on what self-worth means to you.



Self-esteem

This concept is more about our qualities and achievements.


Self-esteem is looking at the positive traits you hold- but building self-esteem is being willing to find the areas in which you struggle, and actively taking steps to improve upon them.


It’s also about learning to accept yourself without so much judgment. It requires that you turn off the part of you that automatically sees yourself as a irredeemably flawed person.


Ways to improve self-esteem include setting up challenges to overcome, challenging negative and limiting beliefs, increasing positive self-talk, and decreasing self-deprecating statements.


Self-care

This concept is ultimately about how we take care of ourselves.


We want to be able to treat ourselves well and keep ourselves healthy, and that requires that we show care for our bodies and minds.


From making sure you are eating the appropriate food, to not allowing yourself to be in toxic and unhealthy relationships, to engaging in an activity that is physically, mentally, and emotionally stimulating, self-care is a great place to start when it comes to learning to love yourself.



Here are some important questions to help improve your self-love:

  • What would someone who loves themselves do?

  • How would they treat themselves?

  • What type of thoughts would they want to have about themselves?

Make yourself a priority because you deserve it.



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